Say hi to the four-eyed freak

He likes me.
I think he likes me.
Does does he 'like me' like me

-Mix Tape from Avenue Q

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I just made this post to tell you guys that I have glasses! I've always wanted glasses, but as they say, "be careful on what you wish for". Right now I feel ashamed. I was the one amongst my friends having perfect eyesight... But now. It's gone. My parents were frustrated. I've always wanted to be a pilot. However, I can't be a pilot with these crappy eyes! I wear these glasses so that my eyes would heal. I have to wear these for 6 months, and we're not really sure if I could get my eyesight back. It's really sad. So yeah, I should be studying right now... But what the heck! I hate requirments so much! Nothing much interesting happened for the past week, well except for my glasses. And the fact that my brother and I made a pact on jogging every morning even though it's a school day. So basically, I'll wake up at five everymorning. Well, yeah. I gotta go sleep now. I'll be posting a lot after QT's. See yah around! :) 

-Mabel. xx

Not my glass slippers.

I am the one who knows you

I am the one who cares

I am the one who's always been there

-I Am the One from Next To Normal

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Hi there! :">

How are you all? Okay, it's a bit awkward. Lol, it's my first picture in my blog! 

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Every girl dreams of their Cinderella story scene. I'm sure this day isn't mine. These shoes aren't my glass slippers! You see, the graduating batch must wear high heeled shoes to practice for our graduation. Today was the first day of wearing these said heels. My whole foot got numb! I know it's not that high, I just don't wear heels. Not at all. I don't know if I could survive two weeks of this kind of suffering! I know it's for my own good and crap, but seriously, no. -_- I hate heels. 

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As I woke up, I felt like I had a hang-over. I hated waking up on a school day. Even worse, it's a heel day. I went downstairs to eat bread for breakfast. It was dark. I hated it when it was dark. My imaginations fled... I remembered the article that I read. "The Expressionless" I hated myself for reading that article. I thought it was more of an alien thing, it turned out to be a flipping ghost thing. I couldn't go upstairs by myself. I called my lovely maid and forced her to stay with me. While taking my shower, I couldn't close my eyes even though I know the shampoo's just by the corner of my eye. I talked with Ate Tit (yes, I call her that) while I was in the shower.My brother drove me to school. I saw my bathmates wearing heels. It just now hit me that I'm a senior. It felt like it was just yesterday when I laughed at an alumni because she was wearing her heels. Now, I'm the one being laughed at. It hurts, literally. Everyone was complaining. Going up four floors with heels isn't easy! School was typical. When I got home, we ate. I made the most awkward promise ever. My dad suddenly said "Bianca, promise me you won't have a boyfriend while you're in Australia. Have a boyfriend when you stop studying." I made a pinky swear. I don't really care about boys right now. Yes, it feels lonely. I don't need a real man to be with me, I have Niall and Aaron by my side!  

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I found this picture in tumblr. :)) It's funny. Well, if you've watched Next To Normal and Les Miserables you'll get it. :) 

I leave you with that. Have a good night everyone! :*

-Mabel. xx

A Next To Normal Sunday

There's only now

There's only here, give in to love or live in fear no other path no other way no day but today

-No Day But Today from Rent

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I heard my alarm. I immediately set it off and glanced at the clock. It was 9:25 in the morning. I looked around the bed room and noticed that no one was there. I remembered that it was my brother's CSB (College of Saint-Benilde) exam. I thought it was the perfect time to watch Gravity Falls since no one was there. I stood up with my eyes barely opened and looked for the TV button. I pressed the on button and found the remote. I changed the channel and started to watch. Today's episode was Double Dipper. I was kinda disappointed since it was a replay, but I still had a chance to laugh. 

I was too lazy to go down stairs. I decided not to have breakfast. I grabbed my phone and noticed the Wifi was on. I immediately grabbed the laptop under the bed and started being in my own world. I firstly wrote myself a letter. As you notie, I write my future self letters. I used to literally write it in a yellow pad paper. The paper ran out and I decided to put it here. I swore to myself that I won't read it after 3 to 5 years. Yes, it has this time capsule kind of idea. 

After everything, I decided to watch Next To Normal, not just snippets, I mean the whole broadway. Luckily, there's a bastard who took a video of everything. Obviously, I was anticipating Aaron Tveit's parts. When I got in the middle, I didn't really care if I saw Aaron, (since his character was dead, he's doesn't really show much) I was actually into the story. I never really expected to be interested in this. The plot was nice, but it wasn't my type. I loved how I was astonished by it. I was never interested in plots of real life situations (except when someone dies). I loved this one though. By the end, when Dan finally said Gabe's name, I felt my tears running down my face. I was agog. I wasn't expecting to cry. It was a really touchy moment. 

I wanted to find a picture of Aaron with his tux in I Dreamed a Dance.  All I could see was him and Alice dancing. It was alright. 

My mum arrived and she went straight back to bed. I went down to have brunch. 

I was stuck in the laptop with nothing to do. A few hours later my brother texted my mum to pick him up. She rose and left. I saw my dad arrived and kissed him immediately. 

I loved how my family isn't like the one in Next To Normal. This made me think that I am blessed. I might have these times that I want different parents, but now I feel totally blessed with what I have. 

My mum and my brother arrived and I decided to sleep. I hate dreaming. It reminds me of my past. I love sleeping though. I just hate dreams that reminds me of my horrible past. I don't remember much about this dream, I just remember waking up with tears surrounding my face. 

I took a bath and got ready for mass. I hated my wound when take baths. Oh, I forgot to tell you, I tripped hard during our retreat. Now I have this huge disgusting wound. I hate it when I see the puss coming out. It's fucking disgusting. 

I wore my "Let It Shine" shirt and a wonderful pink and black leggings. (No picture for now) It sucked. Since my wound was swelling and had to dry, I actually pulled one side of my legging up. I looked seriously wack! After the mass we went straight home to eat dinner. 

All I prayed about a while ago was for my brother to pursue his dreams. I wanted him to be the rock star that he has always pictured. I want to see him on stage with lots of screaming fans. I love my brother so much. I wouldn't ever replace him. He's my Dipper. 

I guess that's all for today. I promise I'll make better posts next time. I feel sleepy. Okay, bye. 
-Mabel. xx

Be Strong.

Dear future me,

How are you? You settled in SFU? I just wanted to write to you. It's been a while, really. Don't worry though, it's not that bad. You know, our retreat just ended. It was fun. Magui is the best section I've ever been in. Even our Sanglayon week's over. Yeah...

It's hard letting things go. But who says you have to let them go? For the past weeks, my past has haunted me. I remembered everything, all the pain and misery. I remembered him. I cried. I hope he's not haunting you. I hope you're free and happy. Please, I hope you have this boy that lifts you up and never pulls you down. Please Bianca, tell me you have one of those. Please tell me you no longer frown.

Your grades are high, right? They should be. They are. You're on top of the class! Oh, and how's business coming? Are you earning a lot? Hihi. Have you ever thought of going back to the past and stay young like me? I hope you're not. I hope you're happy. You are, aren't you? Well, yeah, good luck with everything dear Bianca. I'll be writing soon, don't worry. I love you!

-Mabel. xx

Im Alive.

I'm your wish, your dream come true and I am your darkest nightmare too.

 I've shown you, I own you.

-I'm Alive from Next to Normal (Broadway)

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Okay... It's my first post. It's kinda awkward. This isn't my first time though. I used to have my personal blog in posterous, but I hear blogspot's way better. And so it is. You know it took me 2 hours just to get an awesome background? After those two hours, I still haven't got the perfect background, but it is beautiful.

Oh, how rude of me. I haven't introduced myself properly. My name is Bianca Nadine Averilla Carayag. But I actually like to be called after my favorite cartoon character, Mabel Pines from Gravity Falls. I'm a senior in Elizabeth Seton School. I'll be off to college next school year. I'm already enrolled at Southville Foreign University. I'm quite excited actually. I'm just this simple girl that makes people smile. I'm optimistic, and I'd like to stay that way. I can also be troulblesome. Why am I even doing this? I don't know who I am really.

Anyway, back to this post. Recently, I've been addicted to Les Miserables. Well, it's been mainstream for a while now, but I've always loved Les Mis when my brother told me about it way back in his senior year. It's one of the first books I've ever read. I was young then, and I actually forgot how the story goes. I was aghast when our English teacher showed us the trailer in the middle of our lecture. I couldn't wait for it. I watched it with my family on a Saturday in the week it showed. I actually cried four times. (Fantine in I Dreamed a Dream, Eponine in On my Own, Enjolras' death and ValJean's death) I actually bought it's soundtrack when it was already available. You could call me obsessed.

Afterwards, I started cooling down. I was still in love with the movie, however, something else caught my eye. I remembered crying in Enjolras' death. I remembered Enjolras.

I started researching on the actor. His name's Aaron Tveit. His name sounds familiar? Well, he's a broadway legend! Well, not really a legend, but he's famous for being in broadway. (This explains my background) He's been in Next to Normal, Catch Me if You Can, Wicked, Rent and Hairspray. (Yes, I've done my research)

 

Because of Aaron, I actually got cought-up into broadway. I've been watching different broadways. Who says people can't get addicted in a snap? I'm actually happy that my taste for music is changing. I still love One Direction and Avril Lavigne of course, but it's awesome to have new things to listen to. I seriously can't forget when I first watched Next To Normal. Aaron plays Gabe there. Gabe's a son that a mother can't forget. Literally. Gabe died sixteen years ago, but his mum just can't get him out of her mind. The broadway's about the mother having this psychological disease. It has a really nice plot. The first part made me turn red as a potato. It was a house setting... And Aaron was just upstairs with only his boxers on. I couldn't stop myself from screaming. His hotness was too much to handle. 

Supper came. The family went down to the dining room to have some grub. My father was absent. He's on a flight. We had liver and leaves for supper. After eating, we had a debate. It was actually hilarious. You see, my brother asked me "What if one day you'd wake up with Aaron Tveit, Niall Horan, Colton Dixon and Josh Hutcherson beside you and they want to know who would you pick, what will you say?" I was speechless. I knew Colton would be my fourth and my childhood crush, Josh, would be my third. But how could I choose between my barricade boy and my prince? It was harder than a physics test! My mum interupts and says "If I were you I'd pick Enjolras. Why would you even pick Niall? 1D... Pfft" I grabbed a plate and almost threw it at her. "Niall will forever be in my heart!" I screamed "But yeah, that's one hell of a question." I asked my brother what he think... He replied "I'd pick Aaron as well. He's a broadway boy. I'm agreeing with mum here. Well, minus the part where 1D's lame. I respect them, but yeah, Aaron gets my vote." It wasn't much of a serious question, but what if that would happen? It's just weird thinking about it, I know. I told my best friend Charlyn about supper's fiasco. She was also lost for words. I actually asked her who would she pick, Nicholas Hoult or Harry Styles. She couldn't pick between her beast or her Iggy. I guess that's a life of an avererage teenager right here. It is childish, but hey, there's room for silliness anywhere. 

Guess this is goodnight. See you in the morning! Mwah! 

-Mabel. xx

I'm new here. :3

Forgive me. I am new at this site. I guess I should introduce myself? :)) 

Well, I'm Bianca Nadine Averilla Carayag. However, I like being called Mabel. Where do I start? Well, I am a directioner, and I'm not afraid to show it. Other than that, I'm also a Little Black Star. Yes, I know, my choice of music doesn't really go well together... But who says that I can't be a punk princess and enjoy British- Irish mainstream music? :)) Currently, I'm enjoying broadway music. Yes, I guess any genre can fit me. Except R&B. 

I'm just this pudgy girl that enjoys life. I may not be a perfect, beautiful girl, but I am confident, I am strong. I don't care about what other people say about my looks, I'm happy. I'm a music loving bookworm that's lazy. I make mistakes, but I get back up. Like I always say "If I break an arm, I'd always think 'at least I didn't break two arms'. 

Think of every possibility there is. I believe in anything. Impossible is not in my vocabulary. I believe in aliens, in vampires, in werewolves, in witches and warlocks, I believe in magic. There's nothing wrong with having a great imagination that takes you to places that you have never dreamed of. 

Anywhoo... That's me. An optimistic, care-free girl. Enjoy reading.